Fear is loud, urgent, and rigid. It rushes through your nervous system with panic, tightness, and internal commentary ("You can't trust them," "You're going to fail," "Get out now"). Fear nearly demands immediate retreat or control.

Here comes the cliché of - "You just have to love yourself first," which sounds like some twilight zone to those who are clueless about how that might feel, as they have forever been trained that love is either conditional, or they aren't deserving of it.