Empathy and compassion are often used interchangeably as if they were the exact same emotion. However, they represent very different emotional responses. One of them is sustainable and healthy, while the other can lead to dysfunctional relating and profound burnout.
Most of us, when facing conflict, focus on the change necessary in the other so that WE can finally be happy. We tie our peace of mind to an outcome we cannot control, and try to force our loved ones to fit into the mould of our imaginative ideal partner.